Sunday, January 23, 2011

Inner Girlfriend

Hi. Still here. Let's go for a walk.

"Trolley Wood" by Eisley



Out one day
Walking one day
Out one day, with you
Hallelujah
We found a wood with trolleys on wheels
Rolling all around the hills
Hallelujah

And just as soon it had slipped into
The sleepy dusk and it's not very likely
That we'll see it a... we'll see it again

Out one day
Walking one day
Out one day, with you
Hallelujah
We found a wood and then we unfound a wood
And then we cried, "Oh No"
And, please tell me will we ever find again?
In the depths of Trolley Wood
Do trolleys still drive?

Gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
I'm gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
The Trolley Wood has taken me away

Out one day
Walking one day
Out one day, with you
Hallelujah
We found a wood and then we unfound a wood
And then we cried, "Oh No"
And, please tell me will we ever find again?
In the depths of Trolley Wood
Do trolleys still drive?

Gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
I'm gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
The Trolley Wood has taken me away

[repeat verse again]

Gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
I've gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
I've gone for the day to the Trolley Wood
The Trolley Wood has taken me away

So, out one day
Walking one day
Out one day with you
Hallelujah.

Having a Dream

Love to dream. Sharing a dream beams me on.

This was my dream too.

"Dream" by Priscilla Ahn



I was a little girl
alone in my little world
who dreamed of a little home for me
I played pretend between the trees
and fed my house guests bark and leaves
and laughed in my pretty bed of green

I had a dream
I could fly from the highest swing
I had a dream

Long walks in the dark
through woods grown behind the park
I asked God who I'm supposed to be
The stars smiled down on me
God answered in silent reverie
I said a prayer and fell asleep

I had a dream
I could fly from the highest tree
I had a dream

Now I'm old and feeling grey
I don't know what's left to say
about this life I'm willing to leave
I lived it full and I lived it well
there's many tales I've lived to tell
I'm ready now
I'm ready now
I'm ready now
to fly from the highest wing
I had a dream
Dream
Dream
Dream
Dream
Dream
Dream
Dream

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Faces

I love faces and all their gestural expressions, whether subtle or goofy, smooth or awkward. I love the ineffable something that shines through sometimes.

"Nobody Knows Me at All" by The Weepies



When I was a child everybody smiled
Nobody knows me at all
Very late at night and in the morning light
Nobody knows me at all

Now I got lots of friends, yes, but then again
Nobody knows me at all
Kids and a wife, it's a beautiful life
Nobody knows me at all

And oh when the lights are low
Oh with someone I don't know

I don't give a damn, I'm happy as a clam
Nobody knows me at all
Ah, what can you do? There's nobody like you
Nobody knows me at all

I know how you feel, no secrets to reveal
Nobody knows me at all
Very late at night and in the morning light
Nobody knows me at all
Nobody knows me, nobody knows me
Nobody knows me at all

Friday, January 7, 2011

True Love's First Kiss

A kiss will say it all. Some people may think it's sentimental or untrue, but I disagree. A kiss, a real kiss, the kiss of love, transports and transforms.

"At the first kiss I felt something melt inside me that hurt in an exquisite way. All my longings, all my dreams and sweet anguish, all the secrets that slept deep within me came awake, everything was transformed and enchanted, and everything made sense." ~ Herman Hesse

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Insatiable Questionings

"Insatiable" by Lily Frost

Listen to it online: http://www.last.fm/music/Lily+Frost/Situation

rich man wants to find a soul
young girl wants to be a bride
always wanting something's lacking
everything seems brighter on the other side

if this waxing libertine
ages waning - like wine
something's waxing something's waning
everything seems brighter on the other side

is it evil or divine
to want to feel sublime
by using drugs or yoga mudra
or a boss who tells you what to do
so you don't have think or be confused
about decisions anymore

making love without your eyes wide
limits intimate from reaching to its heights
yin as yang and yang as yin
and future comes from what has been
and circles spin

is it love or is it war
that keeps us wanting more
or is it everything combined and balanced
perfectly in simple synchronicity
defines its place in time and space
to grant you destiny

been awake since Thursday dawn - goes
just as easily as joy
in this random repetition
everything seems brighter on the other side

is it money is it fame
what will this life attain
or is it God - the last resort
before the fall into the pit of apathy
or Paris notions seamed with boring speculation
filled with trial and tribution
where's inertia when you need it
and the centrifuge defeated
it takes all your force to relax and be satisfied

insatiable
insatiable

The Vulnerability of Love

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. ~ C.S. Lewis

With each passage of human growth we must shed a protective structure [like a hardy crustacean]. We are left exposed and vulnerable - but also yeasty and embryonic again, capable of stretching in ways we hadn't known before. ~ Gail Sheehy

To take a photograph is to participate in another person's mortality, vulnerability, mutability. Precisely by slicing out this moment and freezing it, all photographs testify to time's relentless melt. ~ Susan Sontag

Love comes when manipulation stops; when you think more about the other person than about his or her reactions to you. When you dare to reveal yourself fully. When you dare to be vulnerable. ~ Dr. Joyce Brothers

When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability... To be alive is to be vulnerable. ~ Madeleine L'Engle

We all need somebody to talk to. It would be good if we talked... not just pitter-patter, but real talk. We shouldn't be so afraid, because most people really like this contact; that you show you are vulnerable makes them free to be vulnerable. ~ Liv Ullmann

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Happy Happy Joy Joy!

I wonder if the doomed and hysterical pressure to be happy is as prominent in other countries as it seems to be in this one.

I was listening to Tommy Tiernan's comedy sketch "Toxic Optimism." The whole track is amazing, funny and insightful - but he really puts his finger on the mania involved. When you HAVE to be happy, how can you really BE happy?

"REALLY want to BE HAPPY. I'm going to try my best to BE HAPPY. I don't care if it drives me F'ing inSANE.."

What if what makes you happy is good criticism? What if your bliss is, well, kind of a downer for other people sometimes? Insights are gained that would be forever opaque if no-one ever made the wrong decision, or found themselves in an unaccountably melancholy mood. Sometimes I'd rather damn the darkness than light a candle. When I try too hard, nothing beams me on. When I'm a bit down, I notice other aspects of life and people and the niche(s) I inhabit than I do in those rare episodic moments of happiness.

Trying too hard to BE HAPPY doesn't make anyone happy. It can even make them a little crazy. But if you know that, there's no reason not to be a little bit silly sometimes, too.

So here's the classic hysteria song, "Happy Happy Joy Joy." Yeah, it does beam me on, but maybe only because my brother and I had so much fun watching it. Doesn't it illustrate the whole point? And yet, doesn't undermining the idea of forced happiness make you feel silly and kind of happy anyway? Enjoy!


Link: Ren And Stimpy-Happy Happy Joy Joy

Ren And Stimpy - Happy Happy Joy Joy

Hello boys and girls, this is your old pal, Stinky Wizzleteats
This is a song about a whale,
NO
this is a song about being happy
That's right!
It's the happy happy, joy joy song!

Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy joy

I don't think you're happy enough, that's right!
I'll TEACH you to be happy!
I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!
Now boys and girls, lets try it again...

Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy joy!

Iffin you ain`t the grandaddy of all liars!
The little critters of nature - 
they don't know that they're ugly.
That's very funny! A fly marrying a bumble bee!
"I TOLD you I'd shoot, but you didn't believe me!
WHY didn't you believe me?"

Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy, joy joy
Happy happy happy happy happy happy happy happy happy happy, joy joy joyyyy!