Sunday, October 18, 2009

The Funniest Stand-up Comedy

Lately, I've been listening to more and more comedy.

I love to laugh, and I consider humor to be a valid source of intellectual stimulation as well as a great survival tool.

I also love to procrastinate via list-making. So, here's my list of the comedy bits that really tickle me from my current collection. Add more in the comments!

Adam Ferrara - In the Name of God
Adam Ferrara - Exquisite Anger
Adam Ferrara - Karma
Andi Smith - Larry Flint
Andy Andrist - Earth First
Bill Burr - Rednecks
Bill Burr - War Protest
Bill Burr - The South
Bill Burr - The Platform
Bill Burr - Oprah
Bill Burr - Population Problem
Bill Burr - Hitler
Bill Burr - Fast Food Conspiracy
Bill Burr - F***ed Up Thoughts
Bill Burr - Muffins
Bill Cosby - Brain Damage
Bill Cosby - Chocolate Cake
Bill Cosby - Genesis
Bill Cosby - The Great Quote
Bill Cosby - The Window Of Life
Bill Cosby - Noah: Right!
Bill Cosby - Noah: And the Neighbor
Bill Cosby - Noah: Me And You, Lord
Bill Hicks - Easter
Bill Hicks - Gideons
Bill Hicks - Orange Drink
Bill Hicks - Odd Beliefs
Bill Hicks - The Sanctity of Life
Brian Dykstra - F**k Texas
Brian Posehn - Religion's Weird
Brian Regan - You Too & Stuff
Brian Regan - Stupid In School
Brian Regan - Log Trucks
Brian Regan - Blasting Zone
Brian Regan - Kids Party Games
Brian Regan - Spider Webs & Bees
Brian Regan - Health Club Stuff
Brian Regan - Elevators & Faces
Brian Regan - Dog Barking
Bob Newhart - Driving Instructor
Bob Newhart - Retirement Party
Bob Newhart - Rocket Scientist
Bob Newhart - Introducing Tobacco to Civilization
Bob Newhart - The Cruise of the U.S.S. Codfish
Chris Rock - O.J., I Understand
Chris Rock - My Favorite Joke
Christian Finnegan - How is This My Fault?
Christian Finnegan - Alaska Is Not an Island
Christian Finnegan - High Dance Threshold
Christian Finnegan - Song Terrorism
Christian Finnegan - If You Don't Have Any 'I.D.'...
Christian Finnegan - Office People (and a Perfectly Good Font Joke)
Christian Finnegan - Bed Skirts, Robot Vacuums, and Bad Financial Planning
Christian Finnegan - The Birds and the Bees
Christopher Titus - If You've Never Thought of Suicide
Christopher Titus - Inner Idiot
Christopher Titus - Crazy Makes You Crazy
Christopher Titus - Our First Date
Christopher Titus - The Ceiling Fan Incident
Christopher Titus - English Batman
Craig Ferguson - Plastic Surgery
Craig Ferguson - Birthing Classes
Craig Shoemaker - Talking Computers
Craig Shoemaker - Stepdogs
Dan Cummins - Jesus, Idaho and Misunderstandings
Dan Cummins - Revenge Is Near
Dan Cummins - Scientology
Dan Cummins - Plans for America
Dan Naturman - Internet Dating
Dan Naturman - At The Bookstore
Dan Naturman - Family Dysfunction
Dana Gould - Genetically Speaking
Dana Gould - Let's Argue!
Dane Cook - Bathroom
Dane Cook - Pranks
Dane Cook - My Son Optimus Prime
Dane Cook - Robe
Daniel Tosh - Mind Of A Sleeping Man
Daniel Tosh - I Heart Dave
Daniel Tosh - Please Light Me
Danny Bevins - Holes
Danny Bevins - Full Circle
Danny Bevins - Sell Freedom
Danny Bevins - Color of Water
Danny Bevins - The Mantis Ain't Gay
Danny Bevins - Laugh Like a Child
Dat Phan - Missing Mother's Day
David Cross - My Wife's Crazy! (Flagwaving)
David Cross - Monica Lewinsky And The Three Bears (The Redneck Voice)
Demetri Martin - Some Jokes
Denis Leary - A*****e
Doug Benson - Three Legged Cat
Doug Benson - Boo and Hiss
Doug Stanhope - Wisdom
Doug Stanhope - Live For Your Sins
Dov Davidoff - Israel, Bus Stop, and a 2-Ply
Dov Davidoff - Big T*****s, Glitter, and 'Don't Assume'
Dov Davidoff - I Judge People, God, and Ray Charles
Dov Davidoff - Love, Magnum, and Mood Lighting
Drew Hastings - Regarding Children
Drew Hastings - Sexual Matters and My Girlfriend
Eddie Ifft - No War for Toner
Eddie Ifft - Has Anyone Seen My Baby
Eddie Izzard - Philosophies with Strange Ideas
Eddie Izzard - The Crusades
Eddie Izzard - Jesus in Religions, Pt. 1
Eddie Izzard - Jesus in Religions, Pt. 2
Eddie Izzard - Greeks
Eddie Izzard - World War II
Eddie Izzard - Jesus and Man
Eddie Izzard - The Future
Eddie Izzard - The Deathstar Canteen
Eddie Izzard - Best Laid Plans
Eddie Izzard - Being European
Eddie Izzard - Romans
Eddie Izzard - Handshakes
Eddie Izzard - Being Cool
Eddie Izzard - James Bond
Eddie Izzard - Einstein
Eddie Izzard - American Dream
Eddie Izzard - Empire
Eddie Izzard - Stonehenge
Eddie Izzard - Church of England
Eddie Izzard - Scooby Doo
Eddie Izzard - The Tyranny of Ducks
Eddie Izzard - The River Styx
Eddie Izzard - Mystic Hopscotch
Eddie Izzard - Six Million Dollar Queen
Eddie Izzard - Do You Think I'm Sexy
Eddie Izzard - Deus Ex Machina
Eddie Izzard - They Lie to Us
Eddie Izzard - Hell In a Shower
Eddie Izzard - The Flight of the Volkswagen
Eddie Izzard - I've Got a Bad Feeling
Eddie Izzard - Death By Chocolate
Eddie Izzard - Afghanistan
Eddie Izzard - Shouting In English
Eddie Izzard - Transvestites
Eddie Izzard - Does He Eat Crisps?
Eddie Izzard - Religion
Eddie Izzard - Birds
Eddie Izzard - Fish & Goats & Swimming
Eddie Izzard - Armageddon
Eugene Mirman - The Right Stuff
Eugene Mirman - Revolve (The Complete New Testament In the Form of a Teen Magazine)
Felicia Michaels - Construction Workers (Can Bite Me)
Felicia Michaels - Speaking in Tongues
Felicia Michaels - Chunk-O-P***y
Felicia Michaels - Honeycombs
George Carlin - I Used to Be Irish Catholic
George Carlin - Special Dispensation - Heaven, Hell, Purgatory and Limbo
George Carlin - Heavy Mysteries
George Carlin - Offensive Language
George Carlin - Some People Are Stupid
George Carlin - Don't Pull The Plug On Me
George Carlin - I Used to Be Irish Catholic
George Carlin - Fear Of Germs
George Carlin - Religion
George Carlin - Euphemisms
Graham Chittenden - The Fear of God, Museums
Greg Behrendt - Chicken Situation
Greg Giraldo - WWJD / Priests / Pope / Wal-Mart / Penguins
Greg Giraldo - SUV / Fat Kids / Suing McDonalds / Dreammakers / Burned G******s
Greg Giraldo - Monkeypox / Osama / Bird Flu
Greg Giraldo - Terrorism
Greg Giraldo - Dyslexic Luger / Civil War Letters / Kids / Baby In River
Greg Proops - Psychochristians & Halloween
Greg Proops - Donuts
Greg Proops - Women's Organs
Greg Proops - The Decider
Greg Proops - Clinton and Perspective
Greg Warren - Work Hard, Play Hard
Greg Warren - West Point
Henry Cho - We Need to Talk
Henry Cho - Gotta Communicate
Henry Cho - The Way Women Talk
Henry Cho - You Don't Have Two Quarters?
Jeff Garlin - Caulk, F***er
Jeff Garlin - F*** You Old Man
Jeff Garlin - Baron Von Cream
Jen Kirkman - Afraid of God and the Devil
Jen Kirkman - Zombies vs. Ghosts
Jerry Seinfeld - Florida
Jerry Seinfeld - Men and Women
Jerry Seinfeld - Scuba Diving
Jerry Seinfeld - Sky Diving / The Helmet
Jerry Seinfeld - Clothing
Jerry Seinfeld - Horses
Jim Gaffigan - Camping
Jim Gaffigan - Bacon
Jim Gaffigan - Ribs and Bologna
Jim Gaffigan - Almost Heaven
Jim Gaffigan - Fast Food
Jim Gaffigan - Waffle House
Jimmy Carr - Girlfriends
Jimmy Carr - Book of Correspondence
Jimmy Dore - Ronald Reagan
Jimmy Dore - Freedom of Speech
Jimmy Dore - Love It or Leave It
Jimmy Dore - Terror Terror
Jimmy Dore - Fascism
Jimmy Dore - Nancy Pelosi
Jimmy Dore - Hegemony
Jimmy Dore - Log Cabin Republicans
Jimmy Dore - Health Insurance
Jimmy Dore - Dick Cheney
Jimmy Shubert - From Democracy To Hypocrisy
Jimmy Shubert - Bovine Intervention
John Bowman - Hope Springs In Turtles
John Bowman - Yog
John Bowman - Ford Truck Man
John Bowman - Ninety Percent Of Your Brain
John Bowman - Crappy Movies
John Heffron - Won't Make You Wait
John Heffron - Dumb Dad?
John Heffron - Haircut scizzorhands
John Heffron - Flinchy
John Heffron - That Head Scares Me
John Mulaney - You Know Who's a Great Lady?
John Mulaney - Math and King Solomon
John Mulaney - The Salt and Pepper Diner
Jonathan Katz - New York City
Jonathan Katz - Marriage and the Law
Karen Williams - Power & Cash Flow Nap Time
Karen Williams - Human Beings
Karen Williams - Friends Drugs
Karen Williams - Therapy
Karen Williams - Vegetarians Smokers
Kathleen Madigan - 68 States
Kathleen Madigan - Weather
Kathleen Madigan - Catholicism (Pope Hilarius)
Kathleen Madigan - Nessie/Aliens
Kathleen Madigan - Smoking
Kathleen Madigan - Natural Disasters
Kathleen Madigan - My Parents
Kathleen Madigan - Politics
Kathleen Madigan - Religion
Kathy Griffin - Cover Me
Kathy Griffin - Sturdy Germans & Pol***s
Kathy Griffin - Nervous Pills & Boxes of Wine
Kathy Griffin - Maya Angelou is Insufferable
Kyle Cease - The Virgin Maury, the Alien, and My Grandma
Kyle Cease - Cheating, Dreaming Old People Who Don't Shut Up
Kyle Grooms - Wearing Glasses
Kyle Grooms - Barack Obama
Laurie Kilmartin - Wild Stalker Love
Laurie Kilmartin - Banging a Russian
Laurie Kilmartin - The Second Amendment
Laurie Kilmartin - God Had a Drinking Problem
Lewis Black - This Moment
Lewis Black - My.......Virginity
Lewis Black - Xmas
Lewis Black - Xmas Halftime
Lewis Black - Chanooookah
Lewis Black - Chanukah
Lewis Black - Chanooookah
Lewis Black - A Great Headline
Lewis Black - Blueberry Pancakes
Lewis Black - TV News and Jerry Falwell
Lewis Black - One Nation Under God
Lewis Black - International Travel
Lewis Black - Greed
Lewis Black - Homeland Security
Lewis Black - Miami And Las Vegas
Lewis Black - F**k, New York, Los Angeles
Lewis Black - The Ozone, Sunblock, The Flu And Nyquil
Lewis Black - IHOP (The International House Of Pancakes)
Lewis Black - Heavens Gate
Lewis Black - The Impeachment
Lewis Black - Other Idiots From Arkansas
Lily Tomlin - The FBI
Lisa Landry - I Had to Marry Smart
Lisa Landry - Advice
Lisa Landry - All for Love
Lisa Landry - Best Laid Plans
Lisa Landry - My Lack of Sex Life
Lord Carrett - The Cycle of Bereavement
Louis CK - Half Dead
Louis CK - I Hate Deer
Louis CK - Girls & Women
Maggie Cassella - Bible Thumper Bumpers
Marc Maron - Lower Your Expectations
Marc Maron - Political Action
Marc Maron - Terrorism
Marc Maron - Fueled By Self Hate
Marc Maron - Life
Marc Maron - Being In Love
Marc Maron - The Older Man
Marc Maron - Yelling At Women
Marc Maron - Out Technologized, Over Informatised, Time Vats
Marc Maron - Yelling At Women
Margaret Smith - Medley: Anti-Depressants / Misery Loves Company / Therapy
Margaret Smith - Dick & Jane
Margaret Smith - Relationships / His & Hers Bathrooms
Margaret Smith - Padded Toilet Seat / Nice A*s
Margaret Smith - Shopping
Margaret Smith - I'm In Debt
Margaret Smith - The Gym
Margaret Smith - Shopping
Margaret Smith - Mammograms
Margaret Smith - Piercing
Margaret Smith - The Year of the Woman
Maria Bamford - Mom's Religion
Maria Bamford - Touched By an Angel
Maria Bamford - I Heart My Country
Maria Bamford - Mental Makeup
Maria Bamford - Competitive Living
Maria Bamford - TV
Maria Bamford - The-rapist
Maria Bamford - Alicia Keys
Maria Bamford - Depression
Maria Bamford - Dad
Maria Bamford - Sister Sarah
Maria Bamford - Arch Enemy from High School
Maria Bamford - My Sister
Maria Bamford - Learning
Maria Bamford - Wizard of Art
Maria Bamford - Mentor
Maria Bamford - Love Songs
Mark Gross - Sesame Street, Dive Bar
Mark Gross - Bowling Alley Bar
Mark Gross - Freaks And Weirdos
Mark Gross - Banking
Mark Gross - College, Student Loans
Mark Gross - Marriage, My Wife & Friends
Mark Gross - Camping, Family Road Trip
Mark Gross - Dad's Toenail, Mom's Tube Top
Mark Gross - Hunter
Mark Gross - Be Thankful, Animal Skins
Mark Gross - Love Is
Mark Gross - Alabama Airport
Mark Poolos - I Like to Say Things
Mark Poolos - Crazy Person Magnet
Mark Poolos - I Love Crazy Women
Mark Thomas - S***m Stuff / Pro-Lifers
Mark Thomas - Demos
Mark Thomas - Hard Work / Building Site
Mark Thomas - The War On Terror
Mark Thomas - The Excuses
Mark Thomas - Saddam Is a Tyrant
Mark Thomas - Reasons
Matt Braunger - Jesus On the Mount
Matt Braunger - Doors Whopper
Michael Loftus - Don't Mess With Texas
Michael Loftus - The Freeway Makes You Mean
Mike Lukas - Too Friendly In the Midwest
Mike Lukas - Security to the Pretzel Stand
Mike Lukas - First Kiss Like a Chicken
Mike Lukas - Women Love the Candles
Mike Lukas - The Empathy Noise
Mike Robles - Religion / Catholics, Baptists, and Da' Witnesses
Miles Jupp - Computer Game
Miles Jupp - New York
Milton Jones - Family
Milton Jones - Family Christmas
Milton Jones - War
Milton Jones - Police
Mitch Hedberg - Phil
Mitch Hedberg - Restaurants
Mitch Hedberg - Canal Smarts
Mitch Hedberg - Belt
Mitch Hedberg - Sandwiches
Mitch Hedberg - Teeth
Mitch Hedberg - Candy Bars
Mitch Hedberg - Pop
Mitch Hedberg - The Pipe
Mitch Hedberg - Sesame Seeds
Mitch Hedberg - Three Easy Payments
Mitch Hedberg - Arrows
Mitch Hedberg - X
Mitch Hedberg - Koalas
Mitch Hedberg - Highlights
Mitch Hedberg - You Were Good
Mitch Hedberg - Shaving Too
Mitch Hedberg - Minibar
Mitch Hedberg - Beret And Pancakes
Mitch Hedberg - Dry Clean Only
Mitch Hedberg - My Necklace
Mitch Hedberg - Lynn
Mitch Hedberg - Tomatoes
Mitch Hedberg - Cookies
Mitch Hedberg - Oatmeal
Mitch Hedberg - Frogs And Bears
Mitch Hedberg - Fire Exit
Mitch Hedberg - The Dufrenes
Monique Marvez - The Difference
Monique Marvez - Tap, Tap
Monty Python - Stoning
Monty Python - Revolutionaries In the Amphitheatre (Loretta)
Monty Python - What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
Monty Python - A Foul-Tempered Rabbit
Monty Python - Crunchy Frog
Monty Python - Dead Parrot
Mrs. Hughs - The Doctor's Office
Pablo Francisco - Cowboys
Patton Oswalt - America, The Retarded Trust Fund Kid
Patton Oswalt - The World's Most Amazing Father
Patton Oswalt - I Hate Hippies
Patton Oswalt - A Brief History Of Shitty Comedy
Patton Oswalt - Text
Patton Oswalt - Birth
Patton Oswalt - Orgy
Patton Oswalt - Lofty Thoughts
Patton Oswalt - Obama... and Time Travel... and Coolness... and the Last Racist
Patton Oswalt - Demons
Patton Oswalt - Sky Cake
Patton Oswalt - Grocery Robots
Patton Oswalt - America Has Spoken
Patton Oswalt - Bubble of Sanity
Patton Oswalt - Great Food Is Cooked By Psychos
Patton Oswalt - Death Bed
Patton Oswalt - Cirque du Soleil
Paul Curtis - Dating
Paul Curtis - President Bush
Paul Curtis - Call Centers
Paul F. Tompkins - Goth Girl
Paul F. Tompkins - I'm So Rich
Paul F. Tompkins - Sesame Street
Paul F. Tompkins - Cherry Picking
Paul F. Tompkins - Potato Famine
Paul Krassner - The Antichrist
Paul Krassner - Disorganized Religion
Pauly Shore - Group Therapy
Ralphie May - White People Gone Crazy
Ralphie May - White Trash
Ralphie May - Open Water
Ralphie May - Midgets
Ralphie May - Mentally Challenged Americans
Ralphie May - Tard Happy
Ralphie May - Tips for an Acid Trip
Ralphie May - Tripping With Mitchell
Ralphie May - Smoking Weed With Jesus
Ralphie May - Iraq, Terrorism and a Fury of Mullets
Ralphie May - Mullet Hunter
Ralphie May - Flip Flops
Ralphie May - Being Right vs. Being Happy
Ralphie May - Living With Tivo
Ralphie May - Lie Every Day
Ralphie May - Boobs
Ralphie May - Couture
Ralphie May - Favorite Gifts
Ralphie May - Work That Money
Rick Shapiro - God's an Idiot
Robert Schimmel - Swimming With a Dolphin
Robert Schimmel - Bargaining With God
Robin Williams - Utah
Robin Williams - Something Awful Is Going To Happen
Robin Williams - These Are Troubled Times My Friend
Robin Williams - Blair, Bush, Cheney, Ashcroft, A Dead Man And Lassie
Robin Williams - Crusade
Robin Williams - Joe, I'm Pregnant
Robin Williams - My One Question
Robin Williams - Marijuana
Ron White - Got' In a Little Trouble
Ron White - Tater Tot Goes to Europe
Ron White - The Town Stinks
Ron White - Heightened State of Awareness
Ron White - I Have a Great Idea
Ron White - All Things Scotch
Ron White - NASA Research
Ron White - Sunglasses
Ron White - Truth in Advertising
Ron White - Plane Crash
Ron White - Married a Wealthy Woman
Ron White - Landscaper
Ron White - Chocolate
Ron White - Truth in Advertising
Ron White - High School
Ron White - Cousin Ray
Ron White - Lug Nut Day
Ron White - They Call Me "Tater Salad"
Ron White - Cincinatti Chili
Ron White - You Can't Fix Stupid
Ron White - Grandma In Texas
Ross Noble - The Climber
Ross Noble - Dodgy Musical
Russell Peters - Speaking English
Russell Peters - Traveling In Vietnam
Russell Peters - Lost Luggage
Russell Peters - English Accents
Russell Peters - Arranged Marriage
Russell Peters - English Accents
Russell Peters - Half-white
Sabrina Matthews - Curing Homosexuality
Sabrina Matthews - Irony
Sabrina Matthews - Dressing Like a Girl
Sabrina Matthews - Kitty Confusion
Sabrina Matthews - Friends and Drugs
Sean Hughes - Matt & Diane
Sean Hughes - Wrong Friends and Family
Sean Hughes - Catholic Sex & Owls
Sean Hughes - French Art Movies
Sean Hughes - Kids
Sean Hughes - French Art Movies
Sean Hughes - Hare Krishna's In Ireland / IRA
Sean Hughes - Ex Girlfriends
Sean Hughes - U2
Sean Hughes - How I Feel (Poem)
Sean Hughes - Lets Stay In
Sean Rouse - God Hates Catchphrases
Sean Rouse - Way Too Young
Sean Rouse - Y'all Pick 'em!
Sebastian Maniscalco - Ipods
Sebastian Maniscalco - Digital Camera and Email
Sebastian Maniscalco - Hygiene
Sebastian Maniscalco - Disgusting People and Dogs
Steve Hofstetter - Lucifer Sam
Steve Hofstetter - Your Possible Pasts
Steve Hofstetter - Brain Damage
Steve Hofstetter - A Great Day for Freedom
Steve Hofstetter - Sheep
Steve Hofstetter - Us and Them
Steve Hofstetter - Facist Anarchists
Todd Barry - Posters
Todd Barry - Aries
Todd Barry - UPS
Todd Barry - Victoria's Secret Designer
Todd Barry - Stomach Flu
Todd Barry - Therapist
Todd Barry - Tull and Vega
Todd Barry - Australia
Todd Barry - Audiences At Fahrenheit 911
Todd Barry - Prairie Dogs, Sweet Soap
Todd Barry - Florida, Air Conditioning, Big Bookstores, K Mart in New York
Todd Barry - Sperm Bank Babies, Real World, MTV Diary, Behind the Music
Todd Barry - Check with Meal, Thanksgiving Dinner, Stealing Backpack
Todd Glass - Words
Todd Glass - Signs
Tom Papa - Where Are You Going?
Tom Papa - Astronaut
Tom Papa - Married
Tom Papa - Not Cool
Tom Shillue - Reunion
Tom Shillue - Chicken and Broccoli
Tom Shillue - Philadelphia
Tom Simmons - Israel Vs. Palestine
Tom Simmons - God and War
Tom Simmons - Technology
Tom Simmons - When Animals Attack
Tommy Johnagin - Not a Fighter
Tommy Johnagin - My Mom
Tommy Johnagin - Cats Are Walkers
Tommy Tiernan - Coffee In America
Tommy Tiernan - Sex & Alcohol
Tommy Tiernan - Toxic Optimism
Tommy Tiernan - Gun Club
Tommy Tiernan - Unfriendly Skies
Tommy Tiernan - How Would Jesus Vote?
Tommy Tiernan - Oh Lourdy
Tommy Tiernan - Tribes
Tommy Tiernan - Teethed Freaks
Tommy Tiernan - Hawk of a Woman


PetePedia said...

Great bits on this list. Just reading the list brought a smile to my face. However, there is at least one glaring omission...Brian Regan's Pop Tart bit. Everything that is wrong in the world today, or at least the origin of it, is in that bit. Keep on laughing.

Alan Weldon said...

I dont see anything listing my name..